I wasn't directly affected by the wildfire being named "The Beast", nor do I even know anyone who lost their home. But being on the road for the last week, relaying essential goods here and there, fuelling up the fire fighters themselves, and witnessing the massive devastation has likely changed me forever. At least I hope it has.

Some of my clothes are ruined, my truck will smell like smoke for an indefinite amount of time, it may take a week to catch up on all this sleep, and I may be down a few friends. However, clothes and trucks are just material things. Things that can easily be washed or replaced. There will be time to sleep. And I have met some of the best people I have ever known.

Witnessing a natural disaster of this proportion has to change you. I can tell you it will snap your priorities into place quickly. It will leave you both breathless and speechless. It forces you to decide what is truly important.

Time and time again I am hearing stories of material goods not even registering on the radar while people were fleeing with little more than what was on their back. They had their loved ones, and that was all that mattered. I realized in those moments what I had truly lost in my own life. Maybe not to fire, but certainly to the internal restlessness of my own soul. Feeling trapped, lost and hurt. I always knew my purpose and had the drive to get there, but I slowly lost faith as others didn't see my vision the way I did. Recently I had decided to really get in tune with Mother Nature. I decided to cease hunting with a gun, purchased a book on communicating with nature, and developed a friendship with a certain Raven that likes to follow me around. I took time to really enjoy nature, to understand it. I asked for signs, and I was given them. And then she showed myself, and the rest of the world, exactly what she was capable of. But as I experienced all that I did this last week, I really found a sense of hope. Hope mostly for my own life. It was like I had created this own fire within myself that wiped out everything I once new. I had produced a burning that even I myself couldn't contain. It destroyed everything in its path, including the person who was once the most important person in my life.

Now as I looked behind me, I can see spots of new life beginning. It's scary and it's hard to move past what I've done, but like a wildfire, it can't be changed and you just have to look forward. And just like a wildfire; with a lot of hard work, tons of support and the complete destruction of everything I once knew, it is controlled and I can begin to rebuild.

I believe that each of us has it within us to be whatever we chose to be in this life. That goes for our career, but it also goes for who we are as people. When I found this meme, I actually got goose bumps. It's like this guy perfectly described what I couldn't for how I do what I do. I'm not a magician, a natural or blessed with God-given talent. I don't give up on a dog, unless you do. I'll fight for your buddy, as long as you are willing to. That's how you help a dog. I'm obsessed.

When I started the journey of overcoming my past trauma, I figured it would take a few weeks, maybe months, tops, to hash it out and move on. Nope. So much Nope. Three years later I finally have a solid grasp on what behaviours of mine were not truly me, and how to battle past my reactions that had become habit. I can now look at my emotions and make the connection of why I feel this way. I'm on the other side of all the confusion, and it's a weird place to be. But all of this happened because I refused to give up on how to "fix" myself. I became obsessed with finding peace. Worth it! Worth every single minute.

What's your obsession?

It's funny how you find answers in the places you're seeking to get away from the questions for awhile. I went to my yoga studio today to just find some calm. I wanted some clarity on a few situations, and I knew that started with finding my balance. Just breathing again.

That's when it hit me that bringing breathing into dog training had always been very natural for me, but maybe it was the missing link for others. Maybe you have a problem dog, or can't seem to jive with a new pup. I get these queries all the time, they've tried "everything", and it's just not happening. So I began asking what happens when you breathe? Well, let me tell you, that weirds people out. It needs more explanation than just a curious mind pondering if breath can make a difference. So let me try to explain through a series of those curious questions.

Take yourself to that moment, you know which one. Your dog is being a fool on the end of the leash. Maybe it's barking wildly at another animal, or just off in its own play world and not listening to a word you say. Now go inward. What's it feel like there? Are your arms tense, shoulders taking all the stress? Hands gripping the leash? Is your chest tight and looking for relief? Are you holding your breath? Maybe wasting that breath instead on repeated commands or trying to convince Fluffy to please, please just listen. I've been there, in fact I've been SO there that I've stormed off in a huff, often just dragging the dog away from the situation. That certainly didn't help.

Once I started bringing my yoga practice to the field, everything changed. I connected to animals. All of them, not just the dogs I am working. Now I find myself trying to bring my field practice to the mat when my mind begins to wander. I tell myself, just breathe.

So next time you find yourself struggling, with your dog or your life, try asking yourself those questions. Are you tense? How does that chest feel? Ok, deep breath. And again. Just breathe until you can tell yourself you've got this. Because you do. All that you have inside you, is enough.

Trying to work with my horses at a new farm, I often get the ah-ha! moment of what it must be like for new dog owners. I am a first time horse owner, and often I'm put directly in the shoes of how frustrating it can be to know what you want out of an animal, but not know how to get there.

Trying to bring connection and humanity back into my work, I have had to really slow down and watch what owners are feeling, through their actions, language, and movements. I see their confidence wither away holding the leash of a 20lb dog. I feel their agitation at commands being ignored. I experience their frustration, surprise and struggle, right along beside them. But there often comes a moment when it clicks for the handler. A slight moment in time, that you'll miss if you're not looking. Suddenly their gate becomes swifter, their eyes shine a little brighter, and a smile soothes the tight lines that once created a furrowed brow. They begin to become in tune with their dog, understand their body language. And understand themselves a little better.

This is the moment I feel that we all long for not only as owners, but as human beings as well. To feel connected, at ease, and just generally comfortable. Comfortable with the world around us, our relationships, and ourselves.

For every handler/canine pair, it can be very different what each seeks out of the relationship with their dogs. But one thing remains the same; they all seek connection. A bond. And an understanding. And I believe we can all achieve it, if we are patient enough and dedicated.

So where does it begin? For me, it began with love and forgiveness. Mostly forgiveness of myself, for the mistakes I have made and the ones I am sure to make again. Then, by loving myself and my animals enough to begin again. Maybe try a new way, or quietly sitting together today instead of pushing too far. Just existing together, and realizing that how I am, will affect how they are. And then to start honouring that connection, within myself and outward.

Positive Reinforcement Only, doesn't exist.

I know, I know, that's not what you wanted to hear. It's not what society wants to hear. But I challenge any trainer to rewire a truly aggressive dogs behaviour, with only positive reinforcement. Then I will change my mind.

I do believe that it is our moral and ethical responsibility to begin with positive reinforcement. Always. With MOST dogs this will be more than enough, likely for the remainder of the dogs life, if introduced properly, at an impressionable stage of the dog's life, consistently. Good luck.

Now, before things get outta hand, I'm not promoting corrections, physical abuse or whatever deranged torture procedure you have concocted in your imagination already. I'm promoting real life. Real circumstances. And real changes. If putting an aggressive dog down is the answer, then I respect that, for that situation. I'm sure people don't come to this decision lightly, and I know for sure the law doesn't. But if someone comes to me with the desire and commitment of NOT putting their dog down, and trying instead to incorporate strategies into their life to make the dog's life comfortable and manageable, then I'm game for whatever it takes. Short of obvious abuse methods. I can't believe I even have to say that, but someone will inevitably come back with something along the lines of, "so you're like gonna beat a dog to make it stop biting, good idea." No. What is a good idea? Research. Then research again before you call yourself a trainer. Anyone can these days. But I find the ones worth your dime, are the ones that want to meet your dog first before they can even begin to recommend a training regimen. It's our responsibility as owners, and trainers, to look out for the best interests of your dog. If someone wants to start with harsh corrections, stop and think. And if someone wants to throw cookies at the problem, stop and think. We need to become open to the idea of balance. Balance within ourselves, and balance within our training.

Let's talk about Humane Education for a minute. Treating all living things with respect, and acknowledging that all life has value.

I'd like to bring that back into the work place. And I guess that means it starts with me. But I have the amazing gift of all those who have gone before me. To practice their life lessons, and start to bring humans back into importance.

Each and every one of us, we are important because of our stories. And not one story is more important than another.

So in this online course I am taking by Brené Brown, we are asked to write our Daring Manifesto. I knew that my answers to the questions, became my manifesto. And that they extended far past my personal life, and inevitably must spill over into my work life in order to live authentically. So here it is, my Daring Manifesto to the world, and most importantly, to myself.

------------------------------------------

The values that guide me in my effort to show up and be seen are...integrity, connection, truth, love and trust.

I stand for...giving back to others, so they may see the truths in themselves.

I am most curious about...how I will change myself and the world around me by having the bravery to live courageously.

I must do something about...mental illness and others search for peace, self acceptance, and following their own path. I must use my experience with canines to guide this dream.

I am most passionate about...dogs. Passing on the unconditional and healing relationship between man and canine.

I have the courage to...be myself. Say and do the things that are important and relevant to my journey. I also have the courage to bring this vulnerability into my work.

I love...passion. The drive to know, do and be, better.

In my heart of hearts I...just want to feel like I am worthy. That I have, and am, enough.

I am on this planet to...teach. And inspire. And learn!

I will love myself by...taking time to fulfill my own mental, physical and spiritual needs.

I will dare greatly by...allowing others on this journey with me as equals, support, love, teachers, students and trust.

------------------------------------------

I left the question part of many answers in as apart of my manifesto because I feel that they are all important questions. And I want to challenge all of you to answer them for yourselves, and write your own Daring Manifesto.

Love and kindness to you all.

Today I decided to buy a scrub brush. For my hands.

It feels good to be back working with nature, and getting my hands dirty, quite literally. I finally took a good look at my hands in the shower today, and I saw that although I was washing the surface, the grit ran deep into the new cracks, calluses, and nicks. I spent a good 15 minutes scrubbing my hands clean. Actually clean.

A deep sense of gratitude washed over me. I felt clean, like a new slate. Going out and being the person I want to be. Closing the gap between talking the talk, and walking the walk.

I finally have the freedom to be exactly who I want to be. I suppose I always had it, but today, I acknowledge the step towards that person. I will fail. I will struggle. And I will make many mistakes. But I will also win. I will also accomplish. And I will also do better.

So it may be another week before my hands are this clean again, but I will smile the smile of joy, at the little things.

I love this new life. I'm finally home.

Sitting there with my youngest gsd, doing yoga in the middle of absolute nowhere, surrounded by the sound of birds settling in for the evening and the soft rush of the river just below our site is where it all became pretty clear.

In the moments coming out of postures I saw a couple walking by with their dog, headed for the river. A pair of plaid jacketed men walking up the path, tackle box and line in hand, and worries left behind. The horses quietly finishing the last of their dinner in their stalls, tired from a day of climbing mountains, looking for hidden water falls. The dogs, also exhausted after an afternoon packed with new smells and their own mountains to climb.

This was it. The life. If I never went home, this would be "the life" people talked about. At least it was for me. Then I thought about home. I had the life there too. Sport dogs to train, horses to roam with and a piece of land to call my own. I didn't need more than that.

A passion for dogs, fuelled by the passion of others who had the same kind of drive to make dogs their careers and livelihoods caused an enormous urge to drive forward. Seek more knowledge, be grateful for today and never ever look back when you've found something you love.

Returning to the mountains always resets my soul.

What resets yours? Got your image? Ok, good. Now go get it.