This guy, the guy at the top...he was my One. He is my One. He broke me. But he also broke me open. And that's the difference between something that just is, and something that just is meant to be.
The reason he happened...was so that he could take my shit, until I could handle the pile myself. He happened so that I could finally face all the shame, guilt, sadness, trauma and hurt that was built up from years of repression. Repression that expressed itself as anger, frustration, anxiety, confusion and chaos...total and complete chaos. He happened to show me the way to myself.
So you grab those tools and you swing wildly until something starts to make sense. And you reach out to the lifeline, and they hold your gaze until it's over. Then you take four years and 37 days to figure it out, because we all heal on our own time...and don't you ever forget that.
My advice? For what it's worth, from my experiences alone...Losing your way, is not the same as giving up. Make note of that. You are allowed to crumble, collapse, fall and skin your knees. Just get back up. Let the anger, frustration, confusion, shame, guilt and trauma be felt. Let it have its moment in your existence. Just don't let the anger, frustration, confusion, shame, guilt and trauma define you. Or your lifetime.
Feel the hurt. Lose your mind. Then take back your life. Hold your head up. Forgive yourself. Continue to be better. Every day.
With only peace and love, I hope you have found the greatest relationship in yourself.
Happy Love Day 💜🔮
What a year 🙃